Getting Engaged

getting-engagedAfter four plus decades of being single and going through all the ups and downs of dating, I amazingly met the man I was meant to be with, fell in love and even more amazingly, got engaged last November. Waiting for God’s best was full of difficult lessons. In looking back, I realize God taught me a lot not just in preparing me for the man He had chosen, but for life in general. I am still clinging to these lessons every day. I want to share two of them with you and hope you will find them helpful in some way.

God will give you the desires of your heart. Psalms 37:4 is such a promising verse. But for years my heart desired love and companionship – and it never came. Year after year I prayed for God’s best in a man I could spend my life with. Nothing. God clearly had other plans for me at the time and after much (much) deliberation, I realized I had a choice to make. I could choose to continue trying to control my life and be frustrated it wasn’t going according to my plan, or I could choose to trust that God had a direction for my life which was best, over and above anything I could manipulate.

Over time, my prayers became focused on seeking His will. I became confident He would provide His best for me. It was scary letting go of those reins. But I knew I never really had control of the horse anyway.  And I actually became excited about what He had in store for me – truly. He was keeping me single for a reason. And I was going to do my very best to fulfill His purpose for me, whatever that entailed. At that point, my heart’s desires had become His.

I remember the turning point, because I became more content and at peace with my life just as it was. In surrendering to God’s will and focusing on trusting His plan for me, I stopped putting energy into controlling my relationship status and started putting energy into enjoying people and life. And today, I pray I continue to hold it all lightly and surrender to God’s plan each day. Not easy, and sometimes scary. But frankly, our plan is based on limited sight. His is based on omniscient love. There is no better alternative than to surrender and trust Him.

I also learned that God’s will is not confusing. My mom used to always quote that verse, “God is not the author of confusion.” And He is not. Waiting for God’s best is just that — the absolute best. And you will know it when you see it. Jim and I laugh about how God brought us together and moved things forward before either of us knew what He was up to, such that there was no way either of us could mess it up! So even if God has to orchestrate bells and whistles for you to get it, you won’t miss His will for you when you are surrendering to Him.

We should never as Christians need to agonize over whether a man is meant to be our husband. God knows what He is doing and when He brings two together — there is a clear peace in the decision. It isn’t perfect… not one of us is perfect.  But there is peace. If we trust God and surrender to Him, He will clearly direct our path. Proverbs 3:5-6.

Are you willing to wait on God’s best?