How Boundaries Are Self-Care
“Setting boundaries is a way of caring for myself. It doesn’t make me mean, selfish, or uncaring because I don’t do things your way. I care about me too.” – Christine Morgan
We hope that as you arrive at the end of this month and the end of our discussion about boundaries, that quote rings true for you. We opened up our discussion realizing that there is a tie between work-life balance and having boundaries in your life. Kind of seems like a no brainer, right? And yet the disconnect continues and the unbalance continues to control all of our lives.
Like any problem you come up against, it’s best to go to the root of the issue and work your way back out. Natalie Jones beautifully laid out for us the identity of the most important boundary from which we should all start to recenter our lives: time spent with God. Living without prioritizing what God has for you is like having access to the biggest library in the world but never opening a single book, even when you’re searching for knowledge. If you want to know how to bring order to your life and set the right boundaries in place, you need to have a firm grasp on what God wants for your life.
We must be careful, though, to not view boundaries as a hindrance. As kids, rules and boundaries are seen as the ultimate murderer of any good time. How many of you remember longing to grow up so you didn’t have anyone telling you what to do? Little did you know you would have plenty of that in your life, including yourself! The key is to train your brain to view boundaries as protection, like a 24/7 security team posted at the borders of what you value most in your life. Setting up those boundaries isn’t always easy, so Diane shared some tips from Molly Fletcher on how to create and stick with the best boundaries for your life.
“Discretion will protect you, and understanding will guard you.” – Proverbs 2:11
At the end of our discussion, it is our hope that you come away with this: God designed a unique roadmap for your life and it is up to you to stay on course. Would you want to to drive on a winding mountain road without guardrails? Then why do you want to go through life trying to keep everything moving forward without the assistance of constant protectors and facilitators?
Boundaries are not “dumb” rules, debilitating restrictions, or discouraging limitations. They are a chance for you to claim and uplift what is most important to you in this life and give those things the time and effort they deserve. They are accountability partners when you start to feel the tug of saying “yes” and letting others tell you what success looks like. Like the quote at the beginning said, boundaries are a form of self-care. If you’re tired of feeling like you don’t have enough time, enough resources, or enough motivation to accomplish what you would really like to in your life, start setting up some boundaries. Your soul will thank you, those around you will thank you, and best of all, your Heavenly Father will be proud of you.
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